Horribly Confused...

So yesterday I had my Legal Assistant interview in downtown Chicago. It was the single worst interview experience I've had in my entire life.

I arrived at the Law Office at 12pm and didn't leave until 7:30pm. I'm not kidding. The worst part of the whole day was that at least 4 of those hours were spent waiting. I waiting to be seen by the first person to interview me. I waited for the second person to interview me. I waited for the tour of the office. I had to wait for the fourth person to interview me. When I finally got the chance to meet the senior partner, I sat in front of his desk and waited for 45 minutes while he talked on the phone to clients and finally sent me out. Then, I waited a total of 2 and a half hours in the lobby waiting to talk to him again while he met with clients. I have never felt so worthless in my entire life.

In total, I met with 7--that's right, 7--employees yesterday. Three of those people had nothing to do with hiring me. I was just pawned off onto them because they had nowhere else to put me.

To make matters worse (and I'll get to my point, I promise) they actually liked me. I was told that, if I get this job, I won't get any vacation time until August for my "honeymoon." This means that I won't get to go to Maria's wedding (in which I am a bridesmaid and have already bought my dress), I won't be able to get my expensive wedding dress fitted so that I can even wear it, and I won't get a bridal shower or get to be involved in making centerpieces for my own wedding. On top of all of that, Bart and I had a fight this morning about the "surprise honeymoon" his aunt and grandparents are planning for us. I am not a person who likes surprises (they make me very nervous) and he has refused to tell me anything at all about it. He refused the other night to call his mom and find out if it was a definite--I wanted to know because one of my best friends wants me to be in her wedding the weekend after mine. Now he's acting like I should have expected this to happen. I didn't! No one clued me in. And, just because my life is so great, I need to decide whether or not to accept this honeymoon and this job.

Right now, everything is riding on this dress. It was super expensive and there is no way that it can be returned. There is also no way that I can wear it unless I fly out to NY to have it fitted. Apparently I need a total of 3! fittings before the wedding day to make sure that it is perfect. I don't know what to do.

This is what it all boils down to:

1. I NEED the job, but will I even be able to be happy there after the way I was treated?
2. I NEED the wedding dress. No two ways about it.
3. I NEED three fittings for the wedding dress.
4. I WANT to enjoy my wedding day and not arrive in NY late the night before the big day.
5. I WANT to have a bridal shower. I've been gypped out of enough wedding fun as it is already.
6. I WOULD LIKE to have the honeymoon, for Bart's sake, if it is possible.

Is it horrible of me to be annoyed with Bart's aunt and grandparents for making this so difficult? I feel that because I wasn't included in ANY of this (I have no idea where we are going or if it is even going to happen) I am being left in a really bad position. I understand that they wanted to give us a special gift, but they never asked us what we wanted to do (as in have the honeymoon now or next year like we had planned). I am going to look ungrateful if I have to give back the honeymoon--but isn't the day of the wedding more important??

Bart and I had originally planned on having our honeymoon on our first wedding anniversary. This wedding has been so expensive and it would give us a whole year to save up money for a really nice trip. All he seems to care about is that we have a honeymoon. It's been a constant battle. We had a disagreement a few nights ago because I told him that I wanted to oversee the decorating of the Four Chimneys the day of our wedding. I don't HAVE to do it, I WANT to! He just has crazy, preconceived ideas about how our wedding is going to play out.

I think if I had all of this to do over again, I would have stayed in NY. I had a good job and made decent money. I would be completely involved in my wedding and I would be able to take off whatever time I needed. I'd be home for the dress fittings, home to make the centerpieces, home to have my bridal shower. I guess I just make bad decisions.